Ancient Chinese Proverbs - Revisited

Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day!.

Man who stand on toilet high on pot!.

It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park 'meat' in girl!

Man who drop watch in toilet have shitty time!

Man who finger girl having period get caught red handed!

Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up wiyh smelly finger!!

Man who buy drowned cat must pay for wet pussy!

Virgin like balloon!.. one prick all gone!

Man who wants pretty nurse, must be patient!!

He who lives in glass house.., must dress in basement!!

Passionate kiss, like spider web, lead to undoing of fly!

Better to be pissed off than pissed on!

He who walk through airport door sideways., always going to Bangkok!

Boy who go to sleep with stiff problem wake up with solution in hand!

Couple on 7-day honeymoon make 'hole' week!

Girl who sit on jockey's lap gets hot tip

Girl who sits on Judge's lap gets honorable discharge

Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion

Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck!!

Man who puts dick in peanut butter jar is fucking nuts!!!

Announcement

Jumpa di sana!!

Take 5

I evaluate buildings like I do women. There are buildings I won't mind for a one-night stand and never return to again, and then there are buildings I'd like to marry. The mistress-type buildings are the superficial ones you like to keep on the side, if you have the money. But my favourite are the old, comfortable government houses in Bukit Tunku. Reminds me of my mother.

- Unidentified doctor, forty-something, quoted in a local men's magazine on structures he likes.

One For The 'Dirty' Road!

A couple goes to an agricultural show way out in the countryside on a fine Sunday afternoon, and watch the auctioning off of bulls.

The guy selling the bulls announces the first bull to be auctioned off:
"A fine specimen, this bull reproduced 60 times last year."
The wife nudges her husband in the ribs & comments,
"See! That was more than 5 times a month!"

The second bull is to be sold:
"Another fine specimen, this wonder reproduced 120 times last year."
Again the wife bugs her husband, "Hey, that`s some 10 times a month. What do you say to that?!"
Her husband is getting really annoyed with this comparison.

The third bull is up for sale:
"And this extraordinary specimen reproduced 365 times last year!"
The wife slaps her husband on the arm and yells,
"That`s once a day, every day of the year! How about YOU?"
The husband was pretty irritated by now & yells back,
"Sure, once a day!....... But ask the auctioneer if they were all with the same cow!!!"

Tokonang Den ( 11 )

Rostam and I arrived early for that function. We were at the school (STAR) attending the handing aid ceremony under Yayasan Tun Hamdan and were at the corridor in front of the staff room, when a group of VIPs passed by. I did not notice anything peculiar until I heard someone mentioning that Dato Mohd Khalid Abdul Halim was around. But I could not figure out which one was him. Even when the procession entered the school hall, I still could not figure out which one was Dato Khalid until the ceremony was over. Someone pointed that Dato Khalid was the one dressed in a blue Indonesian batik. I had a big gasp! I was not the only one though!. Even Dato Awang Adek and Rostam could not recognise him the first time around.

I remember he used to walk around the school compound in wellington boots, with his walking stick and smoking his pipes. Vestis virum facit. At times he looked stylist and elegant. Most of the time he looked 'arrogant'. Enough to make us (students) frightened and scared - by sheer looking at him, by sheer hearing his foot steps, and by his mere presence.

How could one forget - during one session of the school assembly, - when he openly made the remark and statement to those (students) who were 'behaving' like gangsters that he himself was a gangster from 'Aloq Setaq'! His husky, commanding and firm voice, enough to ensure that his words and commands would be obeyed.

Every terms, those with red marks in their report cards, would have had sleepless nights, worrying for the next day to come. HM Khalid would go round to every classes with his cane and would canned us according to the number of red marks that one has. Yes sir ..., Thank you sir!!.

HM Khalid was very stern and strict on discipline. I remembered one particular incident, during school hours - we were in the classroom then - when suddenly we heard a big and loud bang coming from the lower six classroom downstairs. Someone was caught playing a guitar in the classroom - during the normal school hours. And to HM Khalid, that was a big NO. He smashed the guitar into pieces.

What about the incident when 4 students were caught truant? The whole school then witnessed the infamous public canning by him - on the open space between the school and the industrial arts block. Nobody dared to say anything. No one dared to interfere! Not even Pak Lau or Ustaz Mohammad.

Remember the incident at the dining hall? How he came to the dining hall and karate chop a student - to ensure that discipline was being observed? I was seated among the front rows at the time and witnessed the whole 'event'. That guy was taken immediately to the hospital - suspected broken his nose!. And I went to prep with empty stomach that night for I totally lost my appetite after witnessing that incident.

But his love for sports especially rugby was second to none. He must have been very proud to have witnessed during his reign as the HM the school rugby team became the first winner and won the coveted Mori Trophy!. How he cherished and enjoyed the moment when we paraded the trophy to the dining hall on the bullock cart?!

But HM Khalid (Dato') that I met that day was different. Soft spoken and he looked like a guy who could not even lift a finger on anybody let alone hurting them. That day, we reminisced the 'good ol' days'. He even told us a story about a student while waiting outside his room, was so scared that by the time he came out, that boy already wet himself. Ipse dixit!

HM Khalid has long retired and is currently residing in Ipoh and he can be reached at No. 32 Jalan Lasam, 30350 IPOH. House phone no: 05-2546870.

(From Left to Right): Jabbar (Batch 73), Rostam (Batch 73), Midzor Hilal (Batch 69) and HM Khalid (68 till 70)

(From Left to Right): Rostam, Wan Husin (Batch 73), Midzor, HM Khalid and an unknown old boy.

Majlis Berbuka Puasa Batch '73

The date : 15 September 2009. The Venue: Clubhouse, Tropicana Golf and Country Resort. The Event: 'Majlis Berbuka Puasa', Batch '73.

Me and Rostam almost missed the function. I least expected the traffic jam to be that massive. Terrible. I left Putrajaya around 5pm. Knowing that I was already half an hour late and had to rush to Sunway to meet Rostam. As agreed, we were supposed to go together to Tropicana in Rostam's car. But the traffic jam at Sunway toll plaza was unbelievable!! Damned!. Got stranded almost half hour and was a bit worried. By the time I got to Rostam's place, the time was already 6 pm. I could tell and see that Rostam was not OK and was upset - we might missed the breaking of fast at Tropicana. Not to be subdued, I tried to think positive, telling Rostam that we'll be OK and we will be there on time. Surprisingly the traffic after Sunway bridge was moving, slowly but surely. And by the time we reached Tropicana the time was 6.40 pm.

Tropicana was already jammed and crowded with cars. There seemed to be cars every where, We were directed by the parking personnels to drive and park inside the multi level parking block. However, despite going round the 3 levels parking block twice, we failed to find any parking space. Well, there were spaces available but coming in in a big machine - a land cruiser - the choice was limited. When we were told to go out and park the car decided to try Lillian Too 's good luck charm technique and presto! (coincidence perhaps), a parking personnel directed us to park at a parking space meant for the Club committee member!.

Dato Awang Adek, Razali, Lookeman, Dr. Halim, Rahim, Aziz, Hasan, Dato Azlan were already there. The rest were - Wan Husin, Sakaf, Yunus, Ibrahim, Dato Idris, Wan Zain, Md Nor, Dr. Khalim, Omar Suhaimi, Rostam, Syed Hamzah, Halim, Shauki, Razali, and Md Ali. How we wished that others could attend as well. Majority of them had commitments that made it impossible to attend, and some were too far away to make the trip. It would be more fund if Ajoi, Mad Bakar or Saiful was around. Even the presence of guys like Mat Dollah, Omar Dollah or Mat Saleh or even Che Chop Mohamad (where about is he actually?).

The food was aplentiful, the place was grand, and the atmosphere and occassion was splendid and terrific. Everyone was busy acknowledging one another - catching up on the lost times. When Halim told us that that day was his birthday. We tried to get him a birthday cake but alas the club ran out of cakes that night. So instead we had the resident singer accompanied by the resident band, to lead everyone singing the birthday song. By 1015 the event was over.

Perhaps the point raised by Dato Idris was worth pondering - we should gather and meet beyond the fasting month - and by that we may escape the traffic jam!!

Azlan, Awang Adek and Hasan

Rostam, Wan Husin, Syed Hamzah, Shauki and Rahim


Syed Hamzah

Shauki and Khalim


Md Ali, Hasan and Halim

Aziz, Jabbar, Azlan and Awang Adek

Omar Suhaimi, Ibrahim, Md Nor, Wan Zain and Razali

Sakaff, Roslan, Idris and Lookeman

Note:

Apologies to Yunus. There is no photo of you being posted since the one that I took was so blurr that I decided not to have it posted on the blog.